WWYD?
If you have been reading my blog for a while you may know that I have a very rocky relationship with my mother. In fact, I decided back in December to cut her out of my life for the sake of my sanity while pregnant. We are speaking again (mainly because I want Mya to know her and to make her own decision about her). What you may not know is that io have two sisters both of whom I don’t respect or like. I won’t get into details, but I do need advice about something.
My oldest sister Diana* (33) is manipulative and an unfit mother. She has never held a job longer than a year. She never pays her bills on time and is constantly getting evicted. She has two children. Her oldest daughter is 10 and her name is Lea*. Lea’s father is my sister’s soon-to-be ex-husband Juan* (29). In November Diana gave birth to a daughter named Michele”. Michele’s father is NOT Diana’s husband. However, Diana and Juan were still married when she got pregnant for the 8th time by another man. Let me go back a little. Diana and Juan have been together for 11 years and married since 2001. The following is a short list off my sister’s behavior:
(1) She told Juan that her daughter and fiance were killed in a car accident. (Lie. She never had a fiance before Juan and she NEVER had a daughter before Lea)
(2) She told Juan that my mother kicked her out of the house and she was living on the street. (Lie. My mother babies Diana and would NEVER kick her out)
(3) She brought another man to what would have been my Las Vegas Wedding.
(4) She moved with Lea to Florida without her husband under the guise of having to help a family friend. (Lie. Other than my two sisters we know NO ONE in Florida).
You get the idea, right? She is not a very nice person. She lies to get money from my mother and other unsuspecting victims. She tells her daughter that her father is a bastard and that she is going to kill him. In other words, she is CRAZY.
Now, Juan and I have been close from day one. He is a VERY good guy and an even better father. He flies Lea up here from Florida for the summer and every other holiday. Now Juan and Diana are in the middle of an ugly divorce. My sister, the one who started the divorce proceedings, is now unwilling to sign the papers because she wants Juan to take her back (although she has a baby by another guy). Because he won’t she is threatening to take Lea away and she is now attempting to get money from the sale of their house despite the fact that she abandoned her husband for almost 3 years. She even went as far as to try to blackmail him by saying that she would only sign the papers if he gave her 10,000 up front.
My niece is 10 years old and has become the primary care giver for her little sister. She does EVERYTHING short of actually working to take care of her. On weekends my sister send Lea with the baby to various people’s houses to spend the night so that she can party and go on dates. Now my mother, who I swear to God is bipolar or something is actually trying to help her get full custody of Lea. I speak to Juan regularly now, and I am so upset for him because my mother and my sister are trying to ruin his life and to take away everything that he loves.
What should I do? Please help me. I know my mother and my sister are involved, but I have no respect for them and i cannot sit abck and let them do this to Juan. He is so scared that he is going to lose is child and I’m so worried that Lea will have to spend her childhood being neglected and taught that lying and being manipulative and evil are the right things to do.
My mother is mad because I still talk to Juan, but I can’t see myself cutting him out of my life because he made the unfortunate mistake of falling in love with my crazy sister. My mom and I got into a huge fight about this yesterday and it angered me so much. Again, I cannot take my sister’s side in this. She has convinced my mother that she is a victim but she is the one doing the victimizing. She pulled a knife on Juan and threatened to kill him if he did not take her back....and she did this in front of her daughter. Juan’s lawyer is telling him that he doesn’t have a shot at getting full custody, but I feel that there has to be something that I can do to help....
----------------------------
*names have been changed for obvious reasons.
